Woo-eee, this retrograde has me feeling fiery. I must be feeling the fierce Gemini twin. 😉
Eric and I start our morning first chatting over what our day looks like, which then usually leads into some great coffee talk before we get going to start whatever kind of day we have ahead. This morning, somehow, the topic of church came to light. I don’t remember what lead us to that, but amongst the conversation Eric said, “a good question for you to ask a preacher to see if that church would be a good one for you is this, did Jesus have any brothers?”
I agreed that yes that would be a good question but then went to explain that most theologians (I would hope) should know that information. I began to chime in that if I really wanted to know if a church was a good fit for me, I would ask this: “Do you think my way of sharing God and living through Christ is wrong, or perhaps, your way better?”
His reply, “you went deep on me”
HA! Well, when am I not a deep thinker sweetie? When?!?!
Naturally, it got me percolating on this:
We live smack dab in the middle of the Bible belt. I am used to whispers, and birdies loving to chirp in about their opinions of how I live my life through Christ (which looks vastly different from the norm and because I do not regurgitate scripture in the way they choose to, often they think I am not a believer at all). Because you will not find me in a pew on a regular basis, I am immediately seen as “different or wrong” right out of the gate. Since I do this differently than most of the masses, I am a naturalist, and also a Jesus loving shaman, fear strikes in and they think voodoo is my game(which voodoo is a Haitian religion, hoodoo is the dark art of that form, but, who is actually fact checking here..tehehe)
I don’t blame them. Any more, I just don’t play the blame game, period. If I blame anything I blame FEAR, which I understand is a hard one to beat. Society is great at playing the fear game. Daily we are fed our dose of fear in some way or another. If we are not conscious to this, we become quite the great conductors of this energy.
The interesting or humours thing is those who fear me the most or think I will taint their glory by getting to know me, often know nothing more than the whispers they hear or create. For me, I have no desire to become a full-time member of any given church because often churchianity and not christianity becomes the energy that one carries when signing up “full time” or becoming a member. More often than not, people become members to fill a status quo, and not fill the lack of spirit in their life.
I am not saying there aren’t good congregations out there, because there are many. I am also a believer that any religion that leads people to light and love is good for the human collective as a whole. After all, God is I AM ______, pretty sure an infinite number of adjectives, nouns, verbs and so forth can be filled in that space.
For some, they need that structure and reminder to be connected to source, and that is okay. For me, I live every day working to be Christ like, connecting to God on a full-time basis in everything I do. So, should so many church going kind see fear when they look into my eyes?
I think NO, the answer is most often YES.
I have literally had someone stop me while I was explaining connecting to the Angel realm and say, “Oh no, I am sorry, I cannot talk to you any longer, I am too Baptist.”
WHAT?!?! TOO Baptist to continue simply speaking with me? Did I just grow a pair of horns I am not aware of? Are my eyes turning red as I speak of angels?! I didn’t say you had to take every word I say with absolute truth and hold onto it forever and ever after you leave this place; did I?
Fear, this is what fear can do. Fear of going to hell. Fear of doing it all wrong. Fear, fear, FEAR!
I am sorry, Jesus did not come to teach me fear. Nope, I will never succumb to this energy of provoking people into any one path in the name of fear.
As a shaman, someone who is deeply connected to spirit and my spirituality, I belive that we are to share Christ, by sharing love. It is not my responsibility to tell someone how they must find God. When God sent Jesus to Earth during what was a very dark age of human history it was source sending the vibration of love to this Earth. I believe that Jesus was literally showing us as creators among creators what we were capable of. Grace, love, this is what I share with those I meet, this is what I put out into my existence. I provide support and show them kindness so that they can connect to spirit for themselves. Filling their cup with love so that they can hear God for themselves.
We all have this ability. We all can connect in this way. Sometimes life can be so damn hard and draining we just need a gentle reminder, a loving embrace. We need to be shown grace and love from someone expecting nothing in return. Much like the energy Jesus provided as he roamed the lands of Syria. No expectations, just love.
Love IS a game changer. Christ=LOVE. I work daily to be more christ like, to share christ consciousness this is what my faith looks like. I am no longer afraid of taking a stance in self and my connection with spirit. Fear (nasty lil bugger) once prevented me from sharing in this way. I share my stance with those who ask. I don’t need the approval of others, I also have no desire to make someone uncomfortable for the sake of sharing how I feel, or my way of doing things. I feel God in literally everything I do. I see spirit in ALL. Spirit sees, that is good enough for me. I see, hear, and feel source working through me, this is enough for me.
I have nothing to prove. Neither do you! Find your connection to source and live it. If fear overcomes your life, go back to a path of service (sometimes it is a service to self, YOU MATTER TOO)
I trust what God is leading me to do. This post was provoked from nothing more than some morning coffee talk. All is well, life is grand.
I am a believer~ Shanda K