A slice of me! · Day 2 Day Mumbo Jumbo...

Venting, just a wee bit! 

Excuse me in advance, I’m going to use this platform to rant and vent a little…

I love technology, but I also loathe it! People are becoming incapable of holding basic conversations and well quite frankly seem to be losing a basic regard for humans in general, because of the texting age. 

When someone sends a rather lengthy text, because it seems to be the only way this other person will communicate, and you respond with nothing; RUDE! 

What the hell is wrong with people!? 

I won’t go into details, or air out my dirty laundry but this conversation should not have even been taking place through text, if you ask me, but it’s all this other person seems to be able to handle. So, I agree, because my child is involved, and what do I get in return, nadda! 

Yup, nadda, zilch, zip, zero reply!! 

Shit, a go F$&@ yourself would have been nicer than nothing! 

I know I can’t change people, I also know some people refuse to change. But, these days I really do try to give people the benefit of the doubt. It’s a shame to me that this person can only apply our past to the situation, and cannot just let go of that resentment to allow things to truly move forward. They perceive my new found way of living only (well I try really hard) in love, as naive. 

Well, that’s the kicker when people see one standing in their whole and living in love , they often mistake this for weakness; boy are they sadly mistaken! 

Being nice, being spiritual, does not make me a push over. It does not mean I am going to go out of my way to be mean to this person, but I sure won’t be pushed and bullied. I tried to be nice. I said my peace. Now, I am done. Truly done. Okay, I’ll still be nice, but I’m done going out of my way to try and heal this situation. I’m leaving it for God. 

I bent over backwards bc I wanted healing for this situation, but I cannot do it all, and my “little big girl” has had enough. So, that means mommy has had enough. 

That’s the thing, when I’m done…I’m done! 

We tried, you did nothing. 

I asked for you to meet with me so we could bring normalcy to this situation, you did nothing. 

She asked for you to talk to her more, maybe call sometimes; you did nothing. 

It’s hard, when you can see the solution to help heal a situation but, know one cannot make someone do or care the same way you do, It’s the pits!! 

Sigh…

Releasing my frustration here. I’m thankful that my husband has been there since our oldest was one. Our family is not hindered or scorned by any of this. Ultimately, it is my ego that sits here pissy. Because, well life is good, and nothing is changed by any of the events or frustrations above, for that I am grateful. 

I can’t say it’s all ego. Most of me just wants this situation to have the best outcome, for the highest good of all invovled. I pray that he can find compassion, to understand that he was given time, so, she should be given time. 

Time to heal…but believe it or not, I’m on your side. I also told you from the beginning that I would not force her. This is her decision, the ball will always be in her court. Period. Exclamation point!! Always! 

And, if it is really about her, like you claim it to be. Then understand, yes almost twelve is plenty old enough to feel frustrated, to need time. Understand,this is not about you, or I, this is about her! Just because she is a child does not mean she does not understand. A tiny human being, requesting some time. 

In this household we respect our babes, there opinions, and ideas. We as parents are not superior beings over them. We were gifted, chosen by them, to help guide them and show love. We don’t always get it right, but we make an effort daily to be better than the last. To be more attentive and understanding to the ideas of our little ones. We explore their thoughts and dreams through this process of life we have chosen to experience together. 

Parts of me just wish I could push a button that would allow all parties egos to drop, so compassion and understanding could be seen from all parts. I know suffering is the only way to achieve the comparison one needs and seeks in life. 

There are always lessons hiding in the dark…

If I could take it all away, I wouldn’t. Yup, you heard me right. I wouldn’t. Because, if not for my own personal turmoil, and darkness, I would not be who sits and journals here today. Not even close. 

The rough times suck, but they make the good times that much sweeter. The tough times, later gives us compassion and understanding, the tools needed along each unique path. 

I accept all Spirit has put before me. I release all of my worry, fear, and frustration over this matter here. I pray for healing and understanding for everyone involved. 

   This mama is Focusing on these little light beings! I am happy that I am back to making my own schedule so I can play a bigger role in their homeschooling journey, our journey. I give mad props to teachers, they are severely under paid! I could not imagine 30-40 kids! Classes in our area are over crowded. 
 Not for these wee ones.the oldest is not so wee like anymore. They will ALWAYS be my babies😘😍😘

   
   Had to share a picture of the boys too! Leaving today giving thanks for the 60 degree day we are blessed to have today for one of my last holiday special photo shoots! Yay!! Thank you for beautiful weather. Thankful for life, all of it. The ups and the downs. Blessed to live. 
Acknowledging my breath in this space. No struggle, just breathing and thankful for life. Focusing on the now, being here in the now.  

Started in a rant, ending in a prayer. I am so thankful for the lives we live. I am thankful for this space in time.  

 Speaking of space! My new hair makes me thing of a galaxy 🤓 Tehe, it will fade to mostly silver/gray with black now on top. This picture shows the blue hue that is there right now 👇🏽👇🏽👇🏽 

 I’m off to explore this big beautiful space we occupy! I suggest you venture and do the same!! 

Peace, love and happy travels my friends 

💋💋💋 Shanda K 



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